To feel that U belong

Belong. Earth belongs to the group of objects called planets. Fire belongs to the category of five elements frequently referred by Greek philosophers. All beings and all words belong to something. However, it is not always that people recognize the simple fact. Rather, oftentimes, people feel the opposite. The problem is, if people do not recognize this simple fact for too long, they fall into states of depression and lose confidence in their being, a problem I also faced.
Pacing back and forth in the empty corridor, I was feeling distraught. I was back from camp for only 3 days and I was already missing school and the people that shared my life there. Though it was 3 weeks into the summer break, I’ve been away from school for only 2 days before I returned to participate in this camp my school offered. And it was the greatest experience I had this year. I so felt like I belonged at the place. My life was cherished by the beautiful feeling that I belonged at the place.
That golden phase was over now. My darn lab top failed to catch the internet and my only contact to the people remaining at camp, a medium called Facebook, was cut off from me. No one answered the text messages my worn down phone sent and no messages were sent. The sky wasn’t helping me anymore. With the phalanx of clouds and rain arrows my army of hope wasn’t faring well. I didn’t belong here, in this industrialized, sad urban setting where no one wanted me.
I tried plan B. Instead of trying to feel belong among the friends that forgot me, I tried to blend in with the objects and people that surrounded me right now. For the past hours, this didn’t show any promising signs. I decided to take a trip to the busy street downstairs. Stepping out from the elevator, I began walking through the flow of umbrellas and raincoats. I shivered under the cold wind. Or, was really it the wind that made me shiver? With this sudden thought, I stopped dead and realized that wind was not as cold as I expected; it was august anyway. The problem was that I couldn’t feel the warmth I always expected when walking through the bustling crowd. I felt so alone. Oftentimes, when I became depressed I liked to throw myself in the flow of humans and the onset of words people uttered as they passed. But, at that moment I couldn’t. I felt like a lone boulder at the edge of a waterfall that resisted blending in with other sediments flowing with the river.
I felt so lonely. I wondered…”did I live so arduously for this, to never feel belonging to any group?”?
But, then something caught my attention. Something vibrated in my pocket. I took it out. It was my cell phone. I opened the slide phone. “Hello, this is Hae Uk Ko—“. “Tea—cher!! I’m Seongmin and I’m revising my thesis right now, I’ll read it over so you can….”. I reckon he said something more. But I don’t remember anything except that I told him he was on the right track.
I walked back towards my apartment. I couldn’t resist a smile as a warm current wrapped me all over. As I opened the door the TV blurted out, “Tomorrow, the clouds will clear and sun will shine for the first time in four days”.